A Comfortable Couch

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

It only hurts for a little while

We have now lived in the new rental house for a few months, and we've settled into a groove. Moving into this house at first sucked, partially because there were problems with it that shouldn't have been, but that wasn't what really sucked. What really sucked was taking a big move down in house status. I feel ashamed to admit it, but it's true. But it only hurts for little while, then you start to get over it.

But I don't know if I'll ever be over it completely, that is, not feel affected by others material status and consumption. I used to think that somehow I was above it, that I'm tougher than that. But when I really looked at myself honestly I realized I was right down in it.

So the other day we resolved to NOT go house "window shopping". That is, we aren't going to pull into new developments and look at the nice perty houses we could buy, which is something we've done fairly regularly for a long time now. It always seemed like a harmless diversion, but I think it hurts us because "just looking" makes us think about things we don't have, and it makes us sad that we don't have them, even though we know it wouldn't make us happy even we did get them. So we decided to not subject ourselves to that, it's a useless indulgence that often just makes us feel inferior.

So if we are going to live on less, then we have to make sure to not allow the part of our brains that needs status and esteem to hunger for it from material goods we don't need. As we continue to do that, we feel much freer and happier. It's not like we are living like Buddhist monks or something with no worldly possessions and sitting on bamboo mats humming chants. We have material possessions like everyone else and live a pretty comfortable existence. And now that we live in cheaper house we actually feel far more comfortable.

3 Comments:

Blogger aleah said...

I completely understand what you are facing - houses are killer expensive in TO. If I thought about it, I'd be down about the situation too. Perhaps you should consider the blog you mentioned before, the anti-consumption blog, to discuss such feelings in relation to stuff.

Best of luck!

1:43 PMlink  
Blogger Damien said...

I would like to, but I don't have enough to say about the subject to sustain a blog. I was hoping I could find some others interested in contributing, but alas none. Perhaps I should just start it anyway.

1:59 PMlink  
Blogger aleah said...

I'd contribute. Drop me a note on my blog if you do start this up.

1:25 PMlink  

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